Its bad enough that the Ivy League schools scheme about ways to rule politics, now (meaning for the last four years) they are doing the same thing to veganism. We’ve gotta watch out for those vegan illuminaties. Here are some other things to watch out for:
Hello. I’m Tender Branson, and you are? I’m From Barcelona? Didn’t I used to know you back in 2012? Where have you guys been? Never mind. Let’s just get to your new music and all the other cool stuff that came my way this week:
On a recognition scale of one to ten, with one being the girl I dated in elementary school who has since undergone massive amounts of plastic surgery and ten being Jello Biafra at a local diner, Katy Perry fell somewhere in the negative numbers. I didn’t pay an ounce of attention to her or her “accomplishments”. Because of that, every time she wound up in a lineup at my local jail, I failed to pick her out of it (she’s gotten away with so much). Things would’ve continued that way had I not been so slow to switch the channel during the Super Bowl halftime show. Instead I wound up face to face with Ms. Perry. I have to say, because of that performance, she now falls around a five on my scale. Any adult woman who can take herself seriously while dancing between a couple of cartoonish sharks has my attention.
Speaking of dancing with the sharks, Freddy Kennett and Robby Hauldren (aka Louis the Child), had their own experience with that phenomenon this week when they premiered their new remix for Soy Sauce’s “Broken Record” to a bunch of their friends. While the LTC version of the song stays pretty true to the original, it does turn the gyration knob a bit higher. No matter how hard their friends tried to stand still and calmly take in, they failed. Every single one of them. Less than a minute into the song and the whole place looked like Katy Perry’s shark tank. I can’t blame them. You think I didn’t try to find a shark costume while this song pulsed through my speakers? Unfortunately Pokey the pesky horse was the best I could do.
So what does one pair food wise with the new LTC remix? That’s a bit of a tough one. The obvious choice is soy sauce. But LTC’s remix is way to upbeat and fun to be bogged down but that sludgy substance. I imagine the track to be more like a light airy cake full of funfetti. If only there was such thing as a soy sauce cake…that would be perfect <Runs to the nearest google location in Atlanta, looks up soy sauce cake, runs back to the computer>. Guess what people…there is such a thing! When you are down and out thinking there is no way a soy sauce cake exists, just set your sights on Kikkoman and let them deliver. Pair this remix with a chocolate cake covered with Kikkoman’s famous Chocolate Ganache Sauce.
What if Santa’s a Vegan? What if you want to go on a cruise but don’t do the dairy thing? What if Dr. Dog covered Architecture in Helsinki? These were just a few questions that were answered via the internet this week. Here’s some more:
It all started with an old school bus and some used vegetable oil. That, and a crazy idea dreamed up by a musician and former artist manager. Why don’t we make some waves in the music industry and take music to the people who need it by gathering up young, local, unsigned bands and sending them out on tour to do some free shows at colleges, high schools and military bases? While we are at it, let’s include some class discussions and education opportunities for any of the high school kids that are interested in learning about the music industry. What do you say?
That is where the Epic Proportions Tour began. Founded in 2011 by Peter Sotos (the former artist manager) and Gabe Kubanda (the musician) the first tour lasted just three weeks. Since the inaugural showcase, the business has grown. So have the length of the tours. Now the typical tour lasts from 30-90 days and includes many of the major festivals and industry conventions like SXSW, CMJ, Summerfest, Vans Warped Tour and NAMM. The old school bus that runs on vegetable oil? Traded in for an actual motor coach/tour bus. That’s big time, or as they like to say around these parts, the tours just keep getting “proportionally” more EPIC!
The bands you are likely to hear at an Epic Proportions Tour show include mostly local Phoenix artists (where the company is based) that Peter and Gabe have stumbled across and fallen for. Examples include Lost in Atlantis, Halocene, Eclipses for Eyes, Captain Squeegee, and UFN. Occasionally the tour has hosted some international bands like Far Away Stables (Australia) and Take Me To The Pilot (Canada). The latest installment of the tour includes Gabe Kubanda, Hour24 and UFN and runs from now until November 5th. Click here for tour dates.
Mario is a PR director for the Epic Proportions Tour and he puts on quite a show in the kitchen. Usually it involves a German twist. Today Mario has graciously agreed to share his Mole Cake recipe. This dish includes bananas, mandarins and chocolate. It also includes lots and lots of dairy so it is not for the vegan in you, at least not yet (greedily rubs hands together with a crazed look in his eye). Anyway, you can get a hold of the Mole Cake recipe by clicking here.
Some pictures of the process:
Pair the mole cake up with an Epic Proportions Tour approved band such as alumni Corrin Campbell:
A few years back I played with dates as a replacer for chocolate in these Raw Boris Bars. They were all the rage for a week and a half and then I closed that chapter of my life and forgot all about it. When I started looking for a way to secretly add protein to Z-Bot’s diet (I still haven’t gotten her completely down with tofu) I came across a recipe for date and chia pudding. It seemed easy enough and naturally sweetened without added sugar or dairy so I rolled with it. While she couldn’t yet eat the Carob Chips that were layered across the top (or maybe she could, we just didn’t risk it) she wolfed down most of what was below. I followed the recipe almost to a t, though I threw in some cherries because of her affinity for them and my feeling that chocolate covered cherries rule the roost.
The results? Well, not to brag but, it was one of the best dates ever. I didn’t even have to break out the Jehovah Witness Drug Dealer Routine or the “did that edmame really just come from there” joke. When those can stay bottled up, you know it was a good date night.
Dates rolling around in a high speed blender sound a bit like this.