Harold: I want that.
Kumar: What? A Hot Dog Heaven super chili cheese dog?
Harold: No. I want that feeling. The feeling that comes over a man when he gets exactly what he desires. I need that feeling!
Kumar: Are you saying what I think you’re saying?
Harold: We gotta go to White Castle.
I’ve often times placed myself in that scene (and many of those before it, I mean, who wouldn’t want to ride a Cheetah or have Neil Patrick Harris jizz all over the back seat of their car?) and wondered, what would I need to ever feel that passionate about a corporate food product? Even J-Fur has her nachos. When J-Fur sent me a recipe for Veggie Masala Burgers, based on ones you can buy at Trader Joe’s, I nearly hopped into my car and drove the 1,331 miles from Tampa to Cambridge, Massachusetts to hit up their Trader Joe’s (that’s the location that came up when I typed directions from my apartment to Trader Joe’s in google maps. There’s gotta be one closer right?). Sanity quickly won out and I decided to just try the recipe she sent and keep those frozen burgers on my long term grocery list so I can pick some up next time I’m in Massachusetts. These were adapted slightly from a recipe on Daily Garnish.
-1 cup white beans
-2 red potatoes, cubed
-1/2 a bell pepper, diced
-1/2 cup corn kernels
-1/2 cup shelled edmame
-1/2 cup quick cooking oats
-1 Tbs. olive oil
-1/2 inch piece of ginger
-1/4 tsp. mustard seed
-1/2 tsp. tumeric
-1/4 tsp. garam masala
1. Cube the potatoes and saute in a bit of olive oil for five minutes. Add the beans and bell pepper and cook an additional five minutes. The potatoes should be starting to brown.
2. Pour in the corn and edmame and cook until they are heated through.
3. In a food processor, grind the quick oats into small pieces. Add the vegetables, oil and spices and continue processing until a smooth batter appears.
4. In the same pan, heat some more olive oil. Wet your hands and form small patties with the batter. Place in the oil and heat on each side for three minutes.
5. Serve the burgers in a toasted pita with spinach, tomato, red onion and your favorite condiments. Offer one to Neil Patrick Harris as he exits your back seat.
The idea of aging can be a difficult thing for people to handle. Jayson Kramer, frontman of guitar rock band California Wives, is no exception. The idea induces an anxiety that litters the lyrics of his band’s debut album, Art History. “Getting old has always been a source of anxiety, and I think it comes through in music. I went to school for science…and I was taking philosophy courses and their was all this talk of what happens when you get old” (from an interview on redeyechicago.com). Getting old isn’t the only motif, there is also a lot of color (including album opener “Blood Red Shoes) and a number of references to cities other than the band’s Chicago locale (Tokyo, Los Angeles). These lyrical elements lay the foundation for the magical ride that is California Wives’ debut album. Strengthened by guitars that waver between power and pixie and electronic beats that nestle themselves somewhere between front and center and the very back of the room, California Wives have crafted a debut album that will stick with you throughout the day and into the evening. Look for Art History on September 4th as it is released nationwide via Vagrant Records.